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| life: a study in tights |
1. I really love penguins. I've been thinking about this a lot lately, because I've been watching Frozen Planet on the Discovery Channel, and penguins are a significant part of the show. It made me reflect on how I really do love penguins -- particularly emperor penguins, who are (lets face it) adorable and ridiculous (plus? they mate for life). Did you know they grow to an average of 48" in height? YOU GUYS. THAT'S ONLY 14" SHORTER THAN ME. I AM KIND OF A TALL PENGUIN! I also can do a mean penguin dance. Please ask me to do it the next time I see you.
2. I have developed a really obsessive-compulsive "thing" in the last couple of years that prevents me, physically, from cooking and eating a dish without something green in it. I need green stuff in my food. I keep green onions around & garnish with them or chives/cilantro/parsley, otherwise I get very anxious.
3. I really miss studying geography & making maps. I wish I could study it again somehow, but that ship has sailed for now, at least. I wish my brain hadn't leaked out my ears in the 6+ years since I graduated from college, but somehow it has ... my brain used to be so disciplined and sharp!
4. I haven't worn antiperspirant/deoderant in 10 years. I think it's good for bodies to be able to sweat out toxins & not barricade them in, don't you?
5. It really upsets me when people call me "paparazzi." I realize that not everyone is comfortable in front of a camera (hell, I'm not comfortable in front of a camera!) but being called "paparazzi" equates what I do to the lowest common denominator, a vulture who feeds on the carrion of celebrity culture & is not deserving of respect. Is that really what people think?
6. I wish I'd gone to Hogwarts. I'd be a Ravenclaw.
7. Some of you may have seen this on Facebook: every time I fill an ice cube tray with water, I pretend the tray is the Titanic after hitting the iceberg, with all of its unsinkable compartments filling with water.
8. Sometimes I forget how far I've come. The years start to blend together and I forget just how much I improve at photography with each passing year, and how my experiences shape me. I'm still chasing the elusive "full time photographer" situation, but that's mostly due to my lack of business sense.
9. I bring my lunch to work in Mason jars. This is my most hipster quality.
10. I used to be very anti-caffeine due to anxiety. One day, after discovering that my favorite Jones Soda had "pointless caffeine" in it, I came home, created a Livejournal group called "hold the coffee" and used it as a platform to rant and generally act like a tool. Irony: I am totally addicted to caffeine now, a decade later.
11. I keep everything sentimental. This means I still own every single note my friends wrote me in middle school, and every movie ticket stub from middle & high school, and every single thing from school. I don't have a problem with hoarding this stuff, because to me it actually means something. For a while I was saving all of my wristbands from shooting concerts, but now I only save the nice (fabric) ones.
12. My favorite poem is "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" by my favorite poet, T.S. Eliot.
13. I've been listening to so much Maximo Park lately. Like, enough that I should be really embarrassed! In addition to everything that's been scrobbled, I've become addicted to their gorgeous Daytrotter session that was released this week ... bad for my not-so-unlimited data on my phone plan. Have I mentioned that I haven't gone to a concert as incredible as theirs in years? I'm still in the afterglow, and it's been almost a month ... and yes, this is how I get about music.
14. My only recurring dream in life has been about a plane crashing. The specific situation is always different, and sometimes I'm watching, sometimes I'm inside the plane, but the ending is always the same: when the jet hits the ground, instead of exploding into a fireball, it bounces off the ground, often several times. It's very, very surreal, and I've had countless versions of this dream since I was a teenager.
15. When I was 17, I wrote bizarre stream-of-consciousness AU X-Files fanfiction, trying to channel my recently-discovered literary hero Virginia Woolf. Don't believe me? Here's one of them. The other one is better. Scully tries to kill herself, you guys! (Remember: the internet is forever, kids! I wrote this 12 years ago and now here it is).
16. I still buy earrings at Claire's, because they make cute, cheap rainbow earrings, and I am not the type of person to be bothered with ever changing earrings (ever). It's really awkward being a 30-year-old at Claire's, because the 16-year-old employees call you "ma'am" like you're buying something for your kid. :/
17. I currently have 8 piercings: three in each ear, my nose, and my navel. Retired piercings include my tongue, eyebrow and left upper ear. I am done with piercings now & have been since I was 20.
18. I almost always feel very alone in the world. My husband excepted, of course, but even then, I've always had a strong belief that ultimately I am separate from everyone else, meant to wander and figure things out without the benefit of a "pack." Don't feel bad; it's who I am!
19. My favorite article of clothing is my workout pants. I'm kind of obsessed with them. I wish I could wear them all the time, and I really mean every day. I'm wearing them right now!
20. Keeping my brain in tip-top shape is important to me, so I do a lot of crossword puzzles and Sudoku. I once did pretty much every puzzle in an enormous book of Sudoku (I think it was called "the giant book of Sudoku"), and that means 300+ puzzles! The book could barely fit in carry-on luggage on an airplane.
21. I really want to experience a blizzard and a hurricane someday. I do not want to experience a tornado; that's where my fear totally takes over. Tornadoes are not to be messed with!
22. I run almost entirely on nervous energy, which I have to excess, and am prone to running myself ragged. I keep trying to stop, but I don't know how.
23. I've never really had a nickname. I guess I should be happy about that? But I've always wanted one.
24. I don't really understand what life is about, and that truly frightens me. What's the point? If we have this electric existence, only to die and cease to exist ... why is this even happening? Sorry to get all serious all of a sudden, but this is so bothersome to me. I don't like the idea of just how unfair this existence is, if we're these beautiful conscious beings who live rich lives and then it's just all gone like it never happened. I know there's the "live every day to the fullest" mentality that is offered up as comfort to this issue, but it't not a huge comfort to me. It still ends. It's still, ultimately, devoid of long-term meaning. Why on earth would a person work hard and be miserable to achieve some goal, if it means nothing? GAH. Anyway. Sorry.
25. Speaking of pointlessness, this list has taken me 2 days to write and is feeling pretty pointless right now .... I have always been that person who couldn't write the concluding paragraph in an essay.
13. I've been listening to so much Maximo Park lately. Like, enough that I should be really embarrassed! In addition to everything that's been scrobbled, I've become addicted to their gorgeous Daytrotter session that was released this week ... bad for my not-so-unlimited data on my phone plan. Have I mentioned that I haven't gone to a concert as incredible as theirs in years? I'm still in the afterglow, and it's been almost a month ... and yes, this is how I get about music.
14. My only recurring dream in life has been about a plane crashing. The specific situation is always different, and sometimes I'm watching, sometimes I'm inside the plane, but the ending is always the same: when the jet hits the ground, instead of exploding into a fireball, it bounces off the ground, often several times. It's very, very surreal, and I've had countless versions of this dream since I was a teenager.
15. When I was 17, I wrote bizarre stream-of-consciousness AU X-Files fanfiction, trying to channel my recently-discovered literary hero Virginia Woolf. Don't believe me? Here's one of them. The other one is better. Scully tries to kill herself, you guys! (Remember: the internet is forever, kids! I wrote this 12 years ago and now here it is).
16. I still buy earrings at Claire's, because they make cute, cheap rainbow earrings, and I am not the type of person to be bothered with ever changing earrings (ever). It's really awkward being a 30-year-old at Claire's, because the 16-year-old employees call you "ma'am" like you're buying something for your kid. :/
17. I currently have 8 piercings: three in each ear, my nose, and my navel. Retired piercings include my tongue, eyebrow and left upper ear. I am done with piercings now & have been since I was 20.
18. I almost always feel very alone in the world. My husband excepted, of course, but even then, I've always had a strong belief that ultimately I am separate from everyone else, meant to wander and figure things out without the benefit of a "pack." Don't feel bad; it's who I am!
19. My favorite article of clothing is my workout pants. I'm kind of obsessed with them. I wish I could wear them all the time, and I really mean every day. I'm wearing them right now!
20. Keeping my brain in tip-top shape is important to me, so I do a lot of crossword puzzles and Sudoku. I once did pretty much every puzzle in an enormous book of Sudoku (I think it was called "the giant book of Sudoku"), and that means 300+ puzzles! The book could barely fit in carry-on luggage on an airplane.
21. I really want to experience a blizzard and a hurricane someday. I do not want to experience a tornado; that's where my fear totally takes over. Tornadoes are not to be messed with!
22. I run almost entirely on nervous energy, which I have to excess, and am prone to running myself ragged. I keep trying to stop, but I don't know how.
23. I've never really had a nickname. I guess I should be happy about that? But I've always wanted one.
24. I don't really understand what life is about, and that truly frightens me. What's the point? If we have this electric existence, only to die and cease to exist ... why is this even happening? Sorry to get all serious all of a sudden, but this is so bothersome to me. I don't like the idea of just how unfair this existence is, if we're these beautiful conscious beings who live rich lives and then it's just all gone like it never happened. I know there's the "live every day to the fullest" mentality that is offered up as comfort to this issue, but it't not a huge comfort to me. It still ends. It's still, ultimately, devoid of long-term meaning. Why on earth would a person work hard and be miserable to achieve some goal, if it means nothing? GAH. Anyway. Sorry.
25. Speaking of pointlessness, this list has taken me 2 days to write and is feeling pretty pointless right now .... I have always been that person who couldn't write the concluding paragraph in an essay.
Really enjoyed reading this, gave me a giggle! x
ReplyDeleteYay, then I've succeeded! Thanks for reading!
DeleteI totally am completely obsessed with penguins as well. Penguins. are. awesome.
ReplyDelete